Deja Vu

            Today was Esah day, yet again. My little sister is almost like a child to us, we are so so close and she and Husband love each other, which just makes my heart melt. Sometimes, when the two of us are having a bad day and she asks to come over, it's as if all wounds heal up and we forget our anger and submit to happiness in a day with her. I think she pulls Husband's heart strings, he's never been close to any men in her life and he's always been there for her. 

              

      

She and I went to The Falls today while our man of the house was working. It was so cool out and beautiful, some days I need this and even though I was exhausted I was so happy to be out, of course we ended up rushing home when we realized the time, to meet Husband home. 

She was starving when we got home, since Husband wasn't hungry she ate all of his spaghetti! Of course he was hungry minutes later, so what did we do? Braums, I mean after all, he was hungry and we needed ice cream. It wouldn't be an Esah day without Ice Cream...and games.

 Jenga and Candyland, anyone?

Me: Strawberry, Esah: Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough and Chocolate Chip

Scotty: Cookie Dough and Peanut Butter Cup

I've said this before and you'll probably hear it time and time again, he is going to be a great father and seeing his love for her is quite an eye opener of what the future holds. 

I have such a blessed life and I know it only gets better from here on out. Please take note, never let a good day turn bad over something small and always be grateful for every day that you wake. 

-A Wife.

Our week begins

Husband left for work around 9:55 am, I kept telling myself that when he did I would wake up, get ready, go workout, go get more job applications, see Grandpa’s grave all before work tonight. So what do I do? I go right back to sleep until his mother calls me. She just got a facebook and thought that one of the edited, goofy pictures was her baby falling off his motorcycle. um, nope. She is way too funny, needless to say, I’m up. I made myself a delicious solo breakfast, this day is about to begin. 

Yesterday was great. My mom had a little BBQ for Memorial Day/little cousin’s birthday party and it was so incredibly relaxing. For the first time in a while being with all of our family didn’t stress us out. We ate and set out in the sun just talking for hours while all the little kids played in the pool. We started to talk about the vacations we want to take when Husband brought up our honeymoon vacation and I told him, “we always plan on saving but all of your new toys cost just as much as our vacation and we end up spending on those instead.” I’m glad I said something because he told me that we would have the money for whatever I wanted and that this was something I deserved and it was my turn to have that. I was so surprised but mainly relieved. My psychotic planning has begun, later I woke up and saw that he added things to our Bucket List (the one he didn’t seem to interested in before). I think this man shocks me more and more over the years. 

Being married, you don’t think about yourself as much so it’s awesome when your partner puts the extra effort into you instead of themselves and allows you the upper hand. That’s how it should be, thinking of the other person and giving to one another, with no hidden agenda, just because you love that person. There are so many things we hope to accomplish and I believe that we will if we keep doing things the way that we’re doing them. 

-A Wife

Let's talk, seriously.

I have my moments, moments where I just feel like it’s the right time that certain things are talked about. Unfortunately, the only real issue I have to talk to him about is something I don’t see changing any time soon. I completely understand where he is coming from, I understand why he feels the way he feels it’s just that I could never feel the same way. 

Issue: Family

My point: Once you marry, you have made a vow to leave your immediate family to start a family of your own. A life where your significant other comes first no matter what the situation.

His view: Family, your blood. They have seen you through it all, they are there no matter what and no one knows the things you’ve seen like your…brothers. 

It is really hard for me to say this because it is such a touchy subject when it comes to you and your spouse, family. For me, my Husband comes first, always. I stick up for him all of the time and back him up…even when I feel he is wrong, if he is that is something we discuss in the privacy of our own home. He completely understands where I’m coming from and has always shown that but he just doesn’t act on it. There are many reasons for this and I can’t really explain it to you as well as I could if you knew his family. It’s the hardest thing. I always take his word for it, he takes their’s. I cannot wrap my mind around that. So that’s why this time my words were this:

“I understand that you feel that way and I understand that it’s difficult for you but I have this view and it’s hard for me. I don’t ask you to stray from them or your views but I want you to understand that it can be really hurtful. That’s all, every once in a while this subject will come up because it does hurt.”

Husband says,”I want you to understand how much I appreciate this sacrifice. Your sacrifice to handle my family and our relationships is much greater than any sacrifice I’ve had to make and it has not gone unnoticed.” 

I am so happy that I’m in a marriage where we can have discussions like these and talk to each other this way, it may be difficult but it’s also healthy. We have very different views here but we love one another so much that it’s something we share our words, accept, and agree to disagree. I’m not sure how exactly to explain, in full detail, the situations that lead to these conversations and I hate the way it makes me feel but I’m lucky to have a Husband that can talk through these things with me. I just can’t help but wonder if this is something I’ll have to worry about forever…I wonder if when we have a child it will change. Only time will tell. 

Stories from our Thursday

It's a miracle, Husband and I both had this whole day off and completely free! I slept in seeing as how I didn't get to sleep until 4:30 am. Afterwards we went out and donated an entire car full of stuff to the DAV, a thrift/donation store. I love donating and volunteering because it is so fulfilling, plus, Husband was glad to get rid of all the junk I had sitting in the living room. We had lunch at Subway and walked it off at the Mall. He's even cute when he eats, of course, that's the wife in me talking.

For about an hour and a half Husband went on a motorcycle ride with his dad and I made this!

Husband and I have so many things we'd like to accomplish and this is the start to our Bucket List. Every time we do one of these things, we'll pin the index card on the opposite side and write the date on it. My husband likes it, he doesn't really know what to think of all my projects but this is something for the both of us. I'm pretty proud of it and it leaves so much of our future up to us.

          

We had a little snack, okay, not so little but a little froyo never hurt anyone. His flavors of choice are Brownie Batter and Cheesecake yogurts, topped with brownie bites and gummy worms. Mine? Well, I usually like brownie and peanut butter but this time I got Strawberry and Cheesecake, topped with rasberries, strawberries, blueberries, and cheesecake bites. I've been waiting weeks to eat this, a craving I have often. My amazing Husband fed into it. We sat next to a group of older women talking bad about co-workers and that was interesting enough. Husband's words were, "Man, I'm glad I'm not a female." You said it, sir. 

What better way to spend a Thursday then stopping in to the pet store so Husband can play with his favorite animals, he is a kitten fanatic. I love that he turns into a big baby when it comes to these little kittens. 

 

This day couldn't have ended better. We took our malamute for a nice walk, it is way too nice outside not to. Although, he's a bit of a mangy mutt with his fur shedding and all these nasty patches he's got going on, but even then if I had a dollar for every time someone stopped to ask about him or say that we have a good looking dog, well, I'd be making about $6 a day. Husband has to be the one to hold on to this pup, he's just to big for me to hold onto.

This is what this handsome fella looks like while grocery shopping. I think it's important for a married couple to do their grocery shopping together, at least for the first few years of their marriage. Why? Because it's the perfect opportunity to talk and a lot can come up while out getting groceries. Also, setting a budget and making bets on the end price is a fun little game to play. It can also bring you closer, running errands together and doing the dirty work together. Lessons learned. 

Husband cooked me a nice Cajun pasta meal with Tilapia while I cleaned the house up. Our plan is to spend the night eating while watching the Red Box movies we rented. So far, so good. 

There is so much happiness we share in this marriage. We're a team and we share the good and the bad. Unfortunately, not everyday can be like this one, but if it was we wouldn't share the passion we share. Society has a very jaded view on young marriage and I don't blame them, most people give them reason to. Hopefully Husband and I can shine a new light on things. For now, we're just taking it day by day.

-A Wife.

Dearest Love,

Do you remember how it happened? How often do you re-live our little moments in your mind? Is it totally bizarre that we've come so far? I was just thinking how far you've come as an individual and how much I admire and look up to you. Do you know what an influence you've become in my life and how lost I'd be without you? There are so many small moments that led me to believe you were the one.

That time you cleaned up my mess when we were both waiting tables and I sucked. 

That time I saw your beat up face and wanted nothing more than for you to feel better.

That time I was so nervous knowing you were going to sit next to me when you got to IHOP.

That time you waited for me for over an hour to get off work, just so you could say goodnight.

That time you brought me flowers at work, wondering when I'd be ready for a relationship with you.

That time we kissed in the parking lot and it was the first kiss that I ever felt true magic.

That time you whispered you loved me in front of everyone and neither of us were sure where this was going.

That time you drove me to the falls so we could just sit and talk about our lives.

That time when we weren't together but couldn't be apart.

That time you asked me to be your girlfriend and actually gave me your class ring.

Every moment that led to our relationship has become a part of me, every memory having its own place in my heart and when I think back to them I want so badly to go back in time and watch it happen, like a love story on film, only it's our story. It's strange to me that there could have been a reality where we weren't together. I never expected this and I cannot wrap my brain around the fact that right now, in this moment, you and I are sitting in OUR home, preparing to cuddle up in OUR bed, and in the process discussing what's next in OUR future. You are my everything and I only hope and pray that the ones we care most about can one day be as happy as we are. I have never felt so lifted, the way I do every time you look at me, speak to me, laugh with me, or talk about me. This is all I've ever wanted in life and you are all I'll ever need.

You  have opened my eyes to so many truths, so much joy. God has blessed me in this life and led me to the one man I know is worth any sacrifice. You deserve more than I know how to give. 

-A Wife.

"Everything worked out so perfect for you." -Best Friend, Chelcee on my marriage.

Broke Folks

We have $4 to our name, until we get paid this weekend that is. Bills are the worst, growing up is a pain, and working so hard is exhausting, but the fact that we're doing things the right way, earning every bit of our success on our own is enough to make me happy. I always tell Husband, "I'd live in a box with you if I had to". I'm only 21 years old, Husband is 24 and we own our home, 2 vehicles plus a motorcycle, we have groceries stalked at all times and he's paying off college loans, while I'm still a student. I'd say having $4 in the bank is because we're on the right track, almost all of our bills are paid for the month and we owe no one or no place any money. We're at a better place now than either of our parents were at our age, we'll be where his parents are now in just a few years, which is very comforting. We're both so happy and so blessed already, just a few more years of hard times and hard work and we'll be exactly where we worked so hard to be. No one ever said that the real world was going to be easy, we never even expected it to be. I'm okay, in this moment in time, knowing that we're okay with just that $4 in the bank for this week. I'd like a late I can't have and maybe to go shopping, but I know what's appropriate and I know my boundaries, so for now it's DIY and homemade iced coffee for us. This is all okay by me!

The only thing that would make this all a little better is if Husband and I actually got to see each other today, with him working the day and me working the night, but hey you can't always choose these things, and it makes our moments together even sweeter. 

-A Wife

A New Day: Letting go.

Last night was rough for Husband and I, not all days are perfect. Today we decided to let go and let today be good great. After Husband got off work we went grocery shopping and then out for ice cream!

Husband had Peanut Butter Cup and Cookies 'N' Cream and I had the Premium Ice Cream Cone. Afterwards Husband cooked some bacon, chicken sandwiches for me! We had a pretty awesome night and all night we will be watching movies and loving on each other, because that's the way it should be. 

Not all days are perfect, if they were we'd all be bored and not in love and passionate enough to fight for the things that matter. At least today was a good make-up day, which we deserved. This has been a rant/check-in for no apparent reason other than to say hello, there is a beautiful outcome to some of the hardest times, to all you young married couples out there who sometimes need the reminder.

-A Wife.

What's in store for the Hasty family?

This summer I would love to change things up. We want to travel and do things before we decide to have children, but in order to do things like this you need money. So what's a full-time employee/student with a hard working (almost everyday) husband suppose to do? Well Mrs. Hasty spends all day doing yard work and looking for a second job, just for the summer. I thought this would be easy, although, I'm not sure why. There is very little that can discourage me so this is only the beginning. This summer I want to fill the yard with beautiful flowers and a clean house, I want to travel and have a million BBQ's. When you ask for a lot, you have to work a lot. Husband is already doing more than enough and I need to do my part. We are so young and so alive, I would hate to waste all these beautiful days whining and doing absolutely nothing. I have work to do.

If one day I could have a home like this one, all of my dreams would have been answered. Okay, okay, not all of them but a large dream! There's little I need and little I don't have that I want. My dream home is one of those things. Husband has every intention of making this happen, days like this one open my eyes to the many challenges life has thrown at us and that this is something we both deserve. This summer is the start of many productive days of hard work, to earn what we want. Dreams are of plenty, ambition is something that many couples who marry young lack. Not us. Welcome to the new plan, ACHIEVEMENT.

-A  Wife.

MIA: The breakdown.

God bless this man for being as patient and supportive as he is. Today I got a dose of how much he's had to endure the past few days from me. I have done nothing but be consumed by my busy lifestyle and he's right when he says that I need to just take a minute to do nothing with him. On top of the many errands we've had to run for birthdays and holidays, we've been completely broke and I haven't had the time to do my share of things around the house. Dishes are piling up, laundry needing done and a good clean sweep is much needed. Finals were yesterday and today and after today, I'm back to being everything I was before this week, I know I haven't given him all the thanks he deserves for dealing with my in and out of the house behavior. I need a day with this man to show just how much I appreciate that. 

I didn't help much on Mother's Day when I bickered with his brother for an hour straight, and (tmi) I'm sure the poor guy is sexually frustrated, as am I. Now that school has completely sucked the life out of me, I can focus on the summer I'll have with my family. 

Today I woke up while he was getting ready for work to study and I think I've taken in all I can, even though I still don't feel confident about this exam, and he called, from work none the less, "Hi, I just needed to call and say that and say that I love you and miss you so much." He called to say just that, that was all, so I knew then I needed to just stop everything and make this week a dedication to my man. I cannot believe that through all this week we made it without a spat, because we took complete responsibility for every action, this is who we've become and I'm so proud. We have matured so much and weeks like these before would have damaged bits of time we did have together, we beat you young, busy lifestyle! Until further notice, this week I'm declaring it Husband week, it's well deserved.

-A Wife.

IT DOESN'T GET MUCH BETTER

This weekend, it was everything I needed right before my three final exams.

Friday night I went to my little sister's field trip to George Washington Carver National Monument, where she talked me into allowing her to stay the night. She stays with us at least four or five times a month and the poor thing missed Husband (they're extremely close).

After dinner with a friend, Husband and little sister ate dinner together while I stayed up all night studying for finals. I love how close they are because she and I are furthest apart and yet the closest. I practically raised her until I married and now she spends so much of her time with us!

Husband and Sister planned a bedroom attack so I would wake up early and make them a delicious breakfast. I love getting up and making every meal throughout our days, it's so much healthier and I always feel like a good wife. My sister really appreciates this because, being the youngest and the last at home, she doesn't get real home-cooked meals often.

After our breakfast we did some workouts, relaxed, got ready for the day and then lunch time meant a picnic at the park, playing on the slide and feeding the geese. It was windy but so beautiful.

Every time I see pictures like these, I can feel a lump in my throat, one for cries of happiness. How did I get so blessed to have a man like this one, so close to her. It's precious and I know that one day he will make an incredible father. 

For Mother's Day we visited all the beautiful mothers in our lives and spent the whole entire day with family, which isn't always relaxing but worth it in the end, always. This is my mother. She had me at seventeen and had gone through so much, I'm still not sure how she is raising/has raised four girls. She is so strong, so brave. She and I have had our share of hard times and I'm so happy to say we're in such a good place these days. I am so blessed to have her as my mother. 

The night had to end with some baking, that is before I spend all night long studying. I made Peanut Butter 'n' Jelly cake. Unfortunately my lack of patience ruined the prettiness of my cake but at least I have icing to glue the pieces together.

Husband and I have had the best weekend together. After finals tomorrow we have that last day before work takes over again and we become consumed with our busy lifestyles. I'm hoping for another perfect weekend next week and hopefully a healthier one, also. This has been a novel, signing out.

-A Wife.

Love Dearly

As a couple, no one knows your relationship like you do. As humans, we naturally focus on the bad. Don’t ask me why this is but it’s harder to see the good because we react so harshly to the bad. When you talk to people it’s so easy to vent and we almost always forget to gush about all the good things our partners have to offer, leaving room for so much judgement. When all person hears are bad things, they have bad thoughts of that person. It’s a tough world at their guys, sorry to say. With that being said, we are all aware of the flaws within our marriages. Our fighting can sometimes get so intense that all you want to do is leave the scene of the crime and let’s just face it, admission to wrong doing is not our strong suit. Have we forgotten submission completely (no, I’m not talking women submitting to men, I’m talking couples submitting to each other)? Many of you have heard my rant on this before. We have all become so bull-headed. Blinded by anger we forget how much we love each other all the other days. Husband and I have gotten so good and have been catching ourselves and apologizing, almost immediately. We, of course, have our days but they are more rare. 

This morning, Husband was angry because my phone alarm was going off non-stop while I was showering and he had no clue how to shut it off. He came into the bathroom and through a mini fit about it and went back to bed after I shut it off. I left him a “have a good day” sticky note on the table (like I do almost every morning) and wrote that I was sorry for waking him up. He later texted me, “I was a cranky a**hole this morning…I’m sorry for being a dick.” (excuse his obscene language) He and I have been doing so well with this. 

When you take the time to correct you’re wrong doing, it doesn’t mean you’ll be forgiven right away but it can definitely save you a lot of unnecessary bickering. They say to pick your battles, now, I don’t know who ‘they’ are but ‘they’ are right. There are things worth fighting for and an alarm clock in the early hours isn’t worth it. Find things in your Husband/significant other that you couldn’t live without and compare it to a list of things that drive you crazy. Communication is important and it’s time you all sat down and talked it out, changing together makes everything better and draws you closer. Example:

Honey, we need to find a new way to get through these kinds of moments, it’s just not healthy for us to lash out at one another. 

Using terms of endearment can really lighten a situation, also moving in closer and talking in a soft voice. This will calm an argument and turn it into a discussion. Being adults means that you should be able to talk out your problems and handle your actions together, responsibly. Shower your partner with love, everyday compliment he/she at least once. Making them feel better about themselves can also put them in a happier place and their overall attitude will change. The little things you can do to fix the situation are so simple and yet we constantly forget about them. We are of critical nature and our selfishness gets the best of us more often than not. Discipline yourself to better your relationship with others. 

Marriage is no walk in the park and at times it can seem impossible to get through the day but isn't it worth it? 

Hamburger Night in the Hasty Home Anyone?

Husband got off work at five tonight and that meant his delicious hamburgers and my homemade french fries, just for the two of us. Perfection. He, in all his thoughtfulness, rented me The Vow. "I knew you'd like to see it again," he says. So true, a man after my own heart. I am so exhausted and he's being so gentle and kind. I know tonight will be relaxing, another night well deserved. 

Look at this guy, making me dinner and all that! I can't help but think of how blessed I am to have this life and how much I wish everyone could experience this type of happiness. 

Although, I sort of can't wait to work all this hamburger grease off tomorrow at they gym. 

-A Wife.

In our busy lives

This was the smile I so desperately needed before a long night of work. I had an amazing day but I didn't get any time with Husband. This isn't uncommon but I was craving his presence today and I think it's because my day went so well. I will be cramming for finals this week and this means that little time will be spent on my blogs but also that little time will be spent doing things I'd rather be doing with Husband. It's all worth it, I know it is. For our future, we both have to work as hard as we do and I'm so proud of how well we're doing already. We are accomplishing so much and it's only the beginning.

-A wife.

On any given Tuesday

We deserved today.

We always deserve days like today, unfortunately we don't always get them, but this only made us treasure this 24 hours even more. I had a rough morning, that's for sure but it was definitely put behind me in order to enjoy this day off with Husband. When you work full-time and go to school full-time, there is a certain joy you feel in the nothings of a random day. A day like today, with no plans and no hustle and bustle.

After waking up at noon, I headed off to do some volunteer work setting up for a Senior Citizen Prom that's happening tomorrow and Husband went on a nice bike ride with his father (one of his favorite things to do).

Then this happened.

Husband hurt is finger and I came to the rescue with my handy, dandy Dora bandaids. 

I couldn't believe he actually wore it, knowing him, which kind of makes me wonder now if he knows that we have regular ones. hm. Next on our agenda was food, I have been craving my favorite Hawaiian Chicken Salad from Cheddars for days, so this man got me just that. What a guy!

I love when he catches me taking these pictures because he always freezes suddenly, looks up at me, and says, "Really?!" This photo captured that exactly. Perfection. Our waitress was so so strange and I couldn't tell if she was trying extremely hard for a tip, if she was just really slow and odd, or if she wanted Husband's hot bod. I guess we'll never know, either way it got her a $3 from us.

After we went to Powerhouse Gym so I can turn in my application and resume for the second job I'm hoping to get for the summer, the extra cash flow would be more than nice. We picked up the new Underworld movie and headed home after that. Ever since, we've been sitting in the exact same places, doing absolutely nothing and just chilling out. This seemed like the perfect time to gush about him while he sits on the couch playing video games. What kind of wife would I be?

Sometimes it can be so stressful being flat broke and so busy, but hey, we deserve a break don't we. Doesn't any young married couple deserve a break, one where all you do is bask in your love and spend a whole day doing nothing, just being together. j

Tuesday=success.

-A Wife.